In the morning

With the flowers,
with my dogs
I drink black coffee
in the garden,
in the summer,
in the morning
after dawn

I ceaselessly erase you,
as I ceaselessly erase me
The only rejoicing
is involuntary rejoicing
The only true joy
is spontaneous joy—
unplanned happiness and joy

In a closed hierarchy
everyone knows who’s who—
where they sit, where they go
But from outside we look alike
The rules here changed
Total certainty, total commitment,
total revenge, total blame

I was so sure
I was so wrong
When life has no sense
I pick nonsense
What nonsense shall I pick?
Those who don’t know what
throw what they don’t know away

We didn’t grow older together
I see her face again
in that temperamental, sparkling place
In my mind’s reflections
odd and rash —
meticulous, slanderous,
ravenous and sharp

The guy in the high school cafeteria
used to call coffee “coal”
“That’s good coal” he’d say
“I made that coal, myself”
As the leaves begin to change
maybe love will come for me again
There’s still time

We’re nature’s eyes and ears
We’re the animal perceivers, her recorders
Without us nature’s blind,
dumber still and deaf
Plenty of time, yes
There’s plenty of good times left—
Oh well, not now, not yet




-August 29, 2015-