Grief is the pain we pay for love
grief is the pain we pay
This is the grief of living dust
This, the mortal way
A great pinkish trout glides ceaselessly
in pale grey waters
radiant, determined
Golden light glimmers above this pool
easily, ever forward, elegant,
always...
Gladly through this glistening water,
cool, earthless, grey
when you’re ready to love me
feel our heat
you’d best be ready to play
for you and me it’s ecstasy or nothing
or so it was…
grief is the pain we pay for joy
grief is the pain we pay
-February 19, 2007-
You deserted me
Why, Marcia, why?
Why don’t you know?
Still, I yearn for you now everyday
and at every moment of the day
I see your lovely, cruel, distorted face
Go. Really. Go.
What do you want from me?
Devotion.
What will you give for it?
Nothing.
No chance of rescue here
If only the sexual surge
the surging, yearning, moon-tug
if only that had been enough
Make what you will of this
Ask and I shall give
Raise my eyes skyward
Can’t seem to pray for release, not really, and yet
I do really want to be free
And I don’t want to be sad anymore
Here is only heat and rock
sand and thirst
You have made this our place for so long and
in the scarring white light
we will die
I’ve got to get out of here now
Let this song lead us away
Come follow me out or don’t
Stay close to me now or don’t
I won’t look back at you now
I won’t, I won’t, I won’t...
-January 25,2007-
“Where did you go?”
“I went nowhere you told me not to go.”
“I’m not your protector,” she said,
before hurting me to my bones.
“I’m a menace.”
Don’t try to own this—break it
take your love and your heart and just go
(Who protects you from the cruelty of this world?)
you’re alone
I saw her once more in a vision
late at night
she was kneeling by the couch
a stark, fluorescence flaring
one more time, cruelly frozen,
deathly faded, gone…
-January 3, 2007-