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Always

                1.

Always the mediocre girl, almost ugly
   blank and aloof, stares vacantly at me

No one hates, the way lovers hate

If only you could listen to the voices from there
   while you live, really live, right here

Savage instincts, reptile wants

An older world of stockings, tulips, perfumes,
   and invitations opens before her

a deep and corrosive hunger

                2.


If I could see it, I could hit it but
   whatever I do won’t change a thing

Religion, family, love— why care most

for what isn’t real?
   He has these sweet, enduring feelings for her

Toxic fathers, toxic mothers, toxic daughters, toxic sons

Our futile egotistical designs
   Look just over there—it’s a place where we are as happy

as our natures permit

                3.

Playful, not immoral, but just a tad debauched
   If she was furious, she kept it to herself

Those who sit among us like gods

will soon be forgotten
   You needn’t strain for them or listen to them

He did the nature, but I did the hours

Sudden, arbitrary hurts will come
   to the vulnerable and innocent

like a vicious enemy we push and then cross



                4.

A monkey dressed in overalls
   who rips your face off

the bullet in his stomach, and another in his leg

finds his own room, it’s a child’s room,
   and lays down on the bed to die

None of us seems to know how much love we need

But we know well enough when it’s given
   After the argument a dazed lull

where nothing gets fixed or done



                5.

He wants to see things in a kinder light
   She flinched and doesn’t like to be touched

Not much good grows here, the soil’s all limestone

The water flows beneath, pure, cold and deadly
   She could look at my face and tell me

of all of life’s troubles ahead

Her enemies see innocence and want to kill it
   Her grief is strong, but she’s persistent,

she can’t find the bottom or float up to the top

-April 24, 2011-